Ripped from Adweek: These Artful, Wonderfully Written Milk Ads Just Won Gold at Cannes.

Rad rhymes by slam poet Harry Baker.


It's a know fact
that milk helps for healthy teeth to grow.
So I dedicate this
to those who put their teeth on show.

I don't just mean the winners,
I don't just mean the dreamers;
I dedicate this to the grinners,
I dedicate this to the beamers.

Not that
docile, placid, over-practiced
photostatic selfie face, that

mildly tilted, slightly stilted
nicely filtered, "help me" face.

I mean that proper smile,
could cross the Nile,
crocodile-wicked grin, that

extra-fat Cheshire cat,
lips stretched-to-max
to fit it in.

None of that sugar-coated fake that
leaves you looking like a mumblecrust, or
insecure, lips-demure,
no fun unless I'm drunk enough.

It's that genuine
friendly grin
beckoning to let you in;

cannot help but show the teeth.

At times almost undignified:
it may be asymmetric,
but you'll see in my eyes, I'm still alive
and you'll know that I meant it.

So, you can have your
packaged acting-happy selfie style.
I'd rather keep it simple.
Cheeky dimples

with that healthy smile.

Blank Canvas

You already know me.
I am that
ice cold, white gold,
straight up glass of milk.

I'm of that classy ilk,
smoother than sari silk.
No wonder I break hearts when spilt.

Not one to fake it,
I stay understated.
Them others ain't half as chilled.

I was around before these
aged old casks and stills.
I was around before your
favourite crafted pils.
I was around before they'd
even thought to craft the wheel.

My unforgettable taste
provides the essence of greatness.
I contribute to the strength
in which your whole body
can start to build.

Every millimeter of nail growth,
I am here to help build strong bones up
inside your muscle fibers
as they interlock like railroads.

I make hair so healthy
it emits a pale glow
like halos.
A new you
before you could say old.

These other drinks should take note:
I am not bland
I am a blank

You are my masterpiece.
This is what I have built you for.


There's folk who like to toast with
fine champagne in the works.
Meanwhile James likes his martinis
when they're shaken not stirred.

But there's a taste that I prefer
that always places in first.
It's my brother from another udder -

The thing with M, L, K and I -
it's possible to have a dream in.
When there's milk in front of me
I'm like the cat that got the…


I'm talking slow motion froth sip.
Milk-stache stays on top lip.
Stop, lick, I got this.

Forget those down in one power bomb
desperate for the end of it.
If you want chemistry,
milk's got them elements with benefits.

Whatcha know about calcium?
Whatcha know about teeth so bright
everybody in the crowd see 'em?

Juice ain't the only drink with vitamins.
From A to B2
milk can help you get it in.

Milk's that crop with the cream in it.
Can't help but being with it
more letters than a postman's load
down the street with it.

One glass of milk
can help start a dream with it.
Plus it builds your muscles up
with the protein in it.

Without these, I'd be all sorts of floppy
awkward-bodied, yellow-bellied, jelly-legged
pencil sketch of stressed and restless
less impressive specimens.

With milk, we see what our potential is.
It helps unlock the best within.
If we got the minerals,
we can be in our element.